Arnold Shortman, more popularly known as Hey! Arnold, would be somewhere in most 90s kids top Nickelodeon characters, he’d even make some top all time animated tv characters lists, he is in the top 2 for football shape cartoon heads of all time, but the one place Shortman absolutely tops the charts is when it comes to having the best bedroom in the game. Really, most cartoon youths have your standard boiler plate childhood rooms. Bart Simpson, Doug Funny, Timmy Turner, Cartman, just 4 walls, bed, desk, posters in some form of another. Patrick Star lived under a damn rock. Jimmy Neutron and Dexter had bad ass labs, that wasn’t their bedroom. But Arnold, Arnold had a PAD. Heading up those stairs to a solo top floor room after a hard day of 4th grade and sandlot baseball to complete privacy and the stars above you had to be the bees knees. And don’t say he lived in the attic. Buddy, thats more of a penthouse studio apartment than an attic, I’ve been in attics. So heres an in-depth look at the coolest animated bedroom in the game.
Arnold had everything controlled by a universal remote. EVEN THE COUCH.
I still have more than one remote. Arnold had a remote that controlled his lights, sound system, both TVs and even the couch that folded up into the damn wall. Ya, thats right. Arnold had a couch that came out of his wall. Wasn’t just a couch either, couch and side table. Walk into your room, pop the couch down and kick your feet up, turn The Simple Things on the stereo and the Black Sox on the TV and crack open a cold Yahoo Soda. Talk about a good night. Everyone wants a universal setup, Arnold had one. Also, people say Arnolds TV faces directly out so you cant watch it from his bed. Arnold has a second smaller TV on bed level to throw on when he’s falling asleep. Believe me, Arnold thought of everything.
Roof Access with full glass skylight ceiling
Most people in cities kill for balcony, or a building with a roof. Arnold had personal roof access. Steps built into the wall that head up to the roof. Amazing natural light coming from the glass ceiling during the day and on the flip side, the stars above your head at night. Incredible vantage point for thunder storms. When you have roof access like that as a 4th grader, somewhere down the line you are inevitably going smoke a joint up there and then realize it’s a the perfect place to smoke joints. Arnolds cool too so he was definitely up there roasting doobs with the Gerald when they got older, probably with his grandma too. If you’re going to try and tell me it would get too hot in his room with the skylight ceiling, ill tell you this, Arnold had two windows in his room and the house had AC. No way is Arnold not keeping his room at an ideal temperature.
Raised Bed with Inset shelving units
The two steps up to the bed is such a cool look and he was so far ahead of his times with the inset shelves. Arnold had all the necessities under the bed, glove and bat, blades, skateboard, hockey stick as well as the perfect set up on his shelves. The complete Purdy Boys series among other great books, CDs and records, Mickey Kaline memorabilia, and like I said before 2 TVs. Arnold was even an indoor plant guy before all you posers started letting plants die on your bookshelves this year. He also had an alarm clock made from a potato and was a figurine of himself saying Hey Arnold, legendary. You know how people come to hate the song the wake up to every morning, Arnold was self loathing he had himself wake himself up.
Watercooler Fish Tank
Its a common misconception that Arnold had a watercooler in his bedroom. Im all for staying hydrated, but what 4th grader needs a full size water cooler. Either way, Arnold is sneaky an amazing decorator for an adolescent boy, and this is just the masterpiece of the room. A watercooler fish tank. Fish Tanks are so cool. Fish tanks made from things that aren’t fish tanks are even cooler. I bet Abner drank the dirty fish water too.
Computer Desk and Internet
Arnolds desk setup was made for at home learning so he’d be very well prepared for 2020. Although if schooling went virtual during Arnolds time, he’d have dropped out, and not for any bad reasons, but because he’s too smart for it. Arnold was a genius. Whether it was tech, or hands on tools, Arnold was a jack of all trades and if he was quarantined up in that room with a computer and internet as a 4th grader he would have probably invented Facebook with Eugene then cut him out of the business. Probably invent Netflix too. Cant imagine how many of Arnolds socks shattered when they hit the basement flood after getting tossed down the laundry shoot. A downfall of having a computer and internet in your room.
Arnolds room was obviously the spot for poker. Have the boys over and see what baseball cards and candy you can win from them. Harold definitely brought over a nice spread of meats and cheeses from the butcher shop. Helga had to sneak into Arnolds room, but you know Lila Sawyer and Ruth MacDougal were frequent visitors up there. Arnolds room was so cool, Sid even tried to hijack it for a day.I dont think theres any dispute to Arnolds room being the Rolls Royce of cartoon bed rooms. Youd kill to have that room growing up.
Heres a cool video someone created of Arnolds digs.
