Getting together with the boys, hopping in the car, and crushing a long trip en route to a few days of drinking. Road trips are a hell of a time. Got the car Tetris-ed out, and an endless playlist of music ready to blast through the speakers, inevitably going to argue about sports and everyone is going to think they won the argument. When you take off for the first time you can knock out 5, maybe 6 hours, if you have a car that’s good on gas and friends who can control their bladders. Eventually you gotta stop to fill up though, and the crew piles out the car along with the fumes of blunt smoke and farts. Whoevers car it is has to take the time to fill up but the rest of the entourage meanders into the store, one guy moving faster than the other because hes about to piss his pants. This stop into the store is so damn important. You got another long chunk of time in the car coming up and you don’t want any regrets. You’re not looking to break the bank but you have to check all the boxes. Aside from a fresh tin, a new pack of rillos to twist up and some lottery tickets you need to make sure you knock your drink and snack choices out of the park.
Trent joined for his first Dog Walk draft today and it’s no surprise he was a great guest. Showed his preparedness along with patience when the draft absolutely came off the rails mid way through. Figure it out boys. The draft had 5 sub categories; Drink, Chocolate, Gummy, Chip and Miscellaneous, have to get one from each. I’m voting based on whose bag I would want most leaving the gas station. Here is my personal top pick in each cat.
- Drink- Citrus Red Bull (Yellow Can)
- Chocolate- Peanut M&MS
- Gummy- Trolli Sour Worms
- Chip- Cheez It Duoz
- Misc- SunFlower Seeds (Mix a bag of regular and cracked black pepper)
Draft Order- 1- Eddie 2- Trent (First Draft) 3- Carl 4- WSD 5- Chief
ROUND 1-
Pick 1- Eddie; Red Bull (Drink)
Grade- 2 Wings
- Road trips and energy drinks are synonymous. The only time I pick up an energy drink is when I have a long trip in the car ahead of me and its always red bull. Even if it’s with a group of buddies in the car and you may not be driving you have to keep the energy up on the trip to wherever you're going. It isn’t my favorite drink in the cooler by any means but when you are road tripping it becomes essential.
Pick 2- Trent; Sunflower Seeds (Misc)
Grade- BIGS
- Seeds are my first Misc off the board and a stand out miscellaneous so I will not question them going first round at all. They are such a great time killer and you aren’t just stuffing your face for the entire trip with food. If you’re a seeds guy I assume you’re ready with a wide mouth bottle with the cap because if you’re spitting into a Poland Springs or leaving the bottle uncapped you’re a scumbag.
Pick 3- Carl; Travel Size Peanut M&Ms (Chocolate)
Grade- A
- 5 tool player. Taste, Pop-ability, Share-ability, Value and the Graphic. They’re a cornerstone chocolate candy and when you are road trippin and get to splurge for the travel size bag instead of the standard rectangle bag you just feel like you have endless peanut m&ms. Best car chocolate pick off the board.
Pick 4- WSD; Beef Jerky (Misc)
Grade- Still chewin on it
- I just recently drove with my dog to Seguin, Texas. Unbelievable road trip with man’s best friend across the country, but I digress. I had beef jerky on both trips there and back. But I was solo, made grocery store trips and prepped my snacks and food prior to leaving. It wasn’t a road trip with the fellas. It’s one of the most expensive gas station snacks that jumps up your overall total where you can’t just pay with a $20 bill. You are not getting much quantity at all so if two other hands in that car ask to dip in, you are getting depleted quickly. I’m not saying bad pick, but not my favorite pick for this draft.
Pick 5- Chief; Monster Energy (Drink)
Grade- Boo
- With Red Bull off the board, I’m avoiding other energy drinks but that doesn’t mean Monster doesn’t play. Chief is a Monster guy and if that’s the case Red Bull isn’t on his board, Monster is and like i said for Eddie’s pick, energy drinks and road trips go hand in hand. However, Chief is in the wrap around spot so taking Monster in the second round is a much smarter play because now it has to share the first round with what I believe is the superior pick in Red Bull.
-This is a personal topic and you have to fill in the cats, so there really isn’t firm first round value across the board. It varies on what you like and where you think you can get it. I think the first 3 picks off the board absolutely hold first round value though.
ROUND 2-
Pick 6- Chief, CHEEZ-ITS (Chip)
Grade- Crispy
- Cheez-Its are my first overall chip for a road trip so I love this pick, and it reaffirms my beliefs that Chief should have switched around his first and second picks. Perfect size so you aren’t fumbling around trying to grab them and they also give you a feel like the bag is loaded up. You don’t need to be settled on a flavor when you go in either; you can get original, can get white cheddar, can get what I personally go with outside of the car, the Cheez-It Party Mix.
Pick 7- WSD, Flamin’ Hot Cheetos (Chip)
Grade- 10/10 cheesy fingers
- Flamin’ Hot Cheetos are a great chip. They have a good mix of cheese and spice. For a road trip chip however, FHC is not on my board. Maybe if I’m already at a boys weekend or camping somewhere I’m liking WSD roster so far, but for a road trip, I’m passing. It’s one thing to get a little oily/greasy fingers in the car, it’s another to be covered in cheese powder.
Pick 8- Carl, Gatorade (Drink)
Grade- Lightening Bolt
- I think Gatorade is an elite return road trip pick. On the way home when you’re hurting and in a bad place, a nice big glacier freeze or riptide rush is a perfect grab from the cooler. Energy drinks are off the board, Gatorade is the next best drink option.
Pick 9- Trent, Sour Patch Kids (Gummy)
Grade- Sour, then Sweet
- My number two gummy candy on the board. Just a delicious sour candy with the perfect softness when fresh. They are sour enough where you can’t inhale them so you can make them last. Trent is playing for the long game when he gets back into the car and that’s a veteran move.
Pick 10- Eddie, Doritos (Chips)
Grade- B
- Huge household name. Massive variety to choose from. It will get Ed his votes, but i don’t like this pick. Doritos are an elite party chip. A top notch on the couch snack. They aren’t a car chip in my opinion. They hold second round value on name alone though.
-White Sox Dave fell behind here after round 2. The other guys have two solid building blocks with some big names while Dave has two picks that may have more people who would dislike them than like them and I think the Beef Jerky/Flamin Hot Cheetos Venn diagram has a large cross over so he doesn’t help himself get votes.
ROUND 3
Pick 11- Eddie, Reeses Cups (Chocolate)
Grade- Is Ed using big name pandering to try to win the draft?
- Reeses Cups are a first ballot Hall of Fame candy selection. Just as Doritos are a hall of fame chip. The holiday shapes, the minis, the variations of the candy are all just incredible. But also just like Eds Doritos, I’m never getting Reeses cups for the car. The name is going to play just like his chips, but he is losing my vote when we are thinking from the road trip perspective. Eds snacks are great for going back home after hot boxing your buddies jeep.
Pick 12- Trent, Code Red Mountain Dew (Drink)
Grade- Yellow 5
- I am not a soda guy. The occasional fountain soda from a fast food place or a ginger ale when my tummy is a little off, but other than that i’m not really drinking soda. With that being said I think this is a phenomenal pick. Road Trip livin is different and if you really want to let yourself go for a few days with some pop, don’t just go Mountain Dew, go all in and go Code Red. With energy drinks and gatorade gone, Trent just made a draft winning pick with his drink cat.
Pick 13- Carl, Starburst (Gummy)
Grade- Pink, Red, Yellow, Orange.
- Very safe 3 round gummy pick here. In the driver’s seat they may not be the most convenient but they aren’t an-edible while driving. The individual wrapped candies are time killers and I enjoy all flavors. Adding Starburst to Peanut m&ms and gatorade is a very strong first 3 picks
Pick 14- WSD, Swedish Fish (Gummy)
Grade- Lines tangled
- There were so many other better gummy candies out there and people are divided by Swedish fish more than any other gummy candy. Swedish Fish need to be first day fresh to even be good. If someone from the backseat asks if I want any, I’m declining.
Pick 15- Chief, Skittles Travel Bag (Gummy)
Grade- Taste the rainbow.
- Great pick for Chief here in the 15 spot. The skittles travel bag where you can get your whole hand in is awesome. This is the best road trip gummy of the round in a three gummy round.
-Trent wins a pivotal 3rd round. Its the most unique pick on the board. He went out of the box in a thin category. I’m picking what Trents bringing to the counter so far. I don’t dislike anyones, but i’m still leaving Daves off the vote currently.
ROUND 4-
Pick 16- Chief, Salted Peanuts (Misc.)
Grade- Some people have allergies Chief.
- Just a plain jane, nothing exciting about it whatsoever. If I’m road trippin i’m not settling on a snack, and peanuts are settling. Chief has been having a good draft so far, despite trying to railroad the draft because he was rightfully upset about last week’s graphic, but I don’t think you will be winning any one over pulling peanuts out of your bag of snacks.
Pick 17- WSD, Snickers (Chocolate)
Grade- Nuget going to get my vote
- I don’t think of candy bars when I’m going on a road trip. They are easy eating for the driver but that’s not a big deal. Snickers are an amazing candy bar but I’m looking for a different chocolate here.
Pick 18- Carl, Tollhouse Chipwich (Misc.)
Grade- Shocked
- Shook the draft room. It’s like watching the NBA when a guy from overseas gets drafted and you have no idea who it is then it turns out to be Dirk. I did not see this pick coming but when Carl said you just mow it down right away i loved that idea so much and will probably implement this on my next road trip. There is an underlying feeling of the need to share when you’re in the car with the guys, a Chipwhich closes that door and I bet the majority of the car is half parts wowed at your move and half parts jealous they aren’t eating an ice cream sandwich.
Pick 19- Trent, Milk Duds (Chocolate)
- This was Trents Iowa coming out in him. Milk Duds are trash candy. Trent probably picked up some Whoppers while in the gas station too. Trent had my favorite bag so far and then both of Trents handles ripped. There are so many chocolate options out there still and Milk Duds was just a terrible pick. Trent had such a strong start this is disappointing.
Pick 20- Eddie, Trolli Peach Rings (Gummy)
- Although I go to Trolli Sour Worms personally, Trolli Peach Rings is possibly the best pick of that draft so far. I criticized Ed for going with some brand names in the previous rounds but this is an off the radar pick and it really gives Ed a good gas station stop with one scan left on the receipt.
-Chief is the clear loser of this 4th round. Its like going to an ice cream parlor and getting a single scoop of vanilla in a cup. Hes going to regret peanuts. Dave gets a nice cany on the board. Carls pick was a shocker but it was defended so well i still very much love it. Im not sure its winning him the draft however. Milk Dubs severely hurt Trent where Trollis has Ed looking like he’s got the best bag of the bunch.
ROUND 5
Pick 21- Eddie, Oatmeal Cream Pie (Misc)
Grade- Roll Tide
- Eddie just absolutely bodied the 4th/5th wrap around. 50 cents a pop so you are grabbing two no matter what and if it’s a nice gas station and your feeling yourself you can get a full box and you become a hero when you get back to the car. Although im not loving Reese and Doritos in the car, Ed started and finished so strong he may have won himself this draft.
Pick 22- Trent, Sour Cream & Cheddar Ruffles (Chips)
Grade- A
- Trent leaves his chips to the 5th round and gets an absolute banger of a bag here. They almost seem like they are fully gas station specific even though they aren’t. Some people wouldn’t be man enough to grab these, others would be aware of the shelves enough to even spot them. Trent found a superstar who just played at a mid-american conference and didn't have eyes on him. Maybe I will break my teeth on some milk duds after all.
Pick 23- Carl, Cape Cod Chips (Chips)
Grade- C
- Cape Cod chips are delicious. They have a different crunch that other potato chips do not bring to the table. They will not hurt Carl’s team in any way, but they aren’t something I am grabbing in a gas station. Their extra crunch isn’t conducive to the car environment of music and conversation. Even though its the 5th round I liked other car chips better.
Pick 24- WSD, YooHoo (Drink)
Grade- White Trash
- Just like Purdue Pete last week, Dave gets the White Trash draft pick grade of the week. YooHoo stinks. I love chocolate milk to wash down my gas station snacks with chocolate milk so I love taking that lane here in round 5 when you need to fill your drink out, but YooHoo is a poor man’s chocolate milk. I don’t love Daves bag.
Pick 25- Chief, Tootsie Pops (Chocolate)
Grade- F
- Whether you’re a lollipop guy, a non-chocolate eater, or both. This pick is just offensive to the draft. If my buddy walked out the gas station and offered me a Tootsie Pop back inside the car it would be the start of a weekend long running joke with the tootsies pop guy being the but end of it. Just a preposterous pick. I like Chiefs draft through 3, I was going to sink it with peanuts, now I don’t know if Tootsie Pop is even worthy of being on the vote.
After the draft picks were read my vote, I surprised myself and leaned Trent despite the Milk Duds. Maybe it’s because the chocolate category is least important to me in a road trip setting and the chewability gives them longevity. After that pick i didn’t think he’d get my vote but the overall body of work is great. Carl, like he does week in and week out, once again has himself with a team that can win the draft. He never leaves the draft with feelings he is out of the running and that’s the case once again. I really don’t know what the ice cream sandwich pick is going to do for him, help or hurt. I think Eddie has the strongest list of the bunch, but not totally for road trip specific. If I’m leaving 7/11 to go roast a doob at my buddies I’m taking Eds bag every time. I think the mixture of that and his road trip red bull give him a great chance to win. I do not explicitly dislike either Chief or WSD team but I don’t love them either. I’m always taking the Red Bull bag over the Monster one. I’ll pour out Dave YooHoo before the car starts up. Both these guy were the only guys with bad picks which means I don’t think they can win.
HONORABLE MENTIONS:
Drink- XL Brisk Iced Tea bottle. Big Guld Fountain Soda
Gummy- Black Forrest Gummy Bears, Lifesaver Gummy Rings
Chocolate- Mini Oreo Bag, local soft baked cookies at the register
Chip- Bold Chex Mix, Smartfood White Cheddar Popcorn and Cheddar Munchies
Misc- Trail Mix and Assorted Cheese Cubes.
