8 bloggers. 7 days. 1 Media Empire Headquarters. Who will survive?
For the next week, eight of Barstools employees will be living inside the walls of Barstool HQ at a shot to win $10,000. Cannot leave the office. Living at their work for a full week. Eating, sleeping, showering, pooping (hopefully not in that order for the last two). For sake of the times, quarantined in HQ. Now I can think of worse places to be stuck in for a week than Barstools playground. But being trapped in a NYC office with 7 other people for an entire week is certainly not going to be a walk in the park. Well I guess it could be like a walk in a city park, where you get hounded by people trying to sell you comedy show tickets or get you to sign up to end world hunger, see a homeless guy shitting in between benches, get garbage blown into your face and swipe it away just to see two crackheads banging in the bushes. I guess what I’m trying to say is that it isn’t going to be fun.
So here we have the 8 contestants battling it out to win Surviving Barstool. I know more about some of the participants than others. Im also not 100% sure of the overall rules and voting off process. But heres my predictions on each of the eight contestants.
ZAH- +180
Literally from the jungle. Zah grew up in Zimbabwe and eventually ended up producing radio shows, among things, for the media empire that is Barstool. You need to be able to grind and persevere to make that happen so there some reasons right of the jump that make him the favorite. The jungle is certainly isn’t an office but you naturally have to learn some survival tactics that will transfer over. We will see if the city life has turned Zah soft.
Donnie- +220
Donnie is my favorite to win, which isn’t some bold prediction. Donnie has traveled the world, so I’m sure he’s dealt with some brutal stretch’s of travel and been stuck in airport for an extended period. He has lived in so many places that I’m sure he’s dealt with less than stellar conditions for a week. I don’t know the Hoon policy inside the office but if Donnie cant rip a power stick throughout the week that may hurt him. I dont think living in an office for a week will have an effect on the Wonton Don.
Nick Turani- +475
West Virginia bred so being stuck inside an office is probably better than whatever shack in the hills he lived in before. Nick has a admitted to a public pooping problem so you’d think that would be what would eliminate him, however, he’s on record saying he would hold his shits for bi-weekly trips home from college to relieve himself. I cant even imagine holding a poo for 2 14 days but who am I to question Nick, all of his stories and tales are 100% true. I can imagine Nick can create chaos in a contest style setting like this so that could win it for him, but also could get him voted off.
Trysta Krick- +900
I don’t know much about Trysta. I know she made two hourly workers she had never met before dumpster dive for airpods and filmed it so she has no shame, and thats a positive for a survivor competition. I don’t know if that will translate to the tribal council though. Trysta is too much of an unknown to me to have confidence.
Brianna Chickenfry- +1000
Brianna said she will not shower at the office so thats a tough start. If the option is there, despite bad conditions, you have to take it over the course of the week. I think she will excel at playing sides and avoid any getting voted out. I just don’t know her lasting power.
Tommy Smokes- +1350
Tommy may be elite at watching survivor, but hes soft as baby shit. A bad night of sleep and some sniffles and he’ll voluntarily be out of there. He could be +13500. I also think he has the ability to rub people the wrong way so I don’t know if he survives vote offs if they are a part of this contest.
Kelly Keegs- +1500
Kelly is going to be the most prepared. She is probably the nicest so no one is going to end up hating her. I don’t know if Kelly has the sandpaper in her to last a week with the likes of the people in this group. Im not questioning her ability to at all, I just don’t know enough to make a solid prediction.
White Sox Dave- +7500
These odds are so bad that something fishy seems afoot. Maybe its because Dave is on the road. Maybe its because Dave isn’t the most liked. He is an outsider coming to HQ trying survive. Dave also has had the shortest visit in the history of visits to NYC to come to Barstool in the past so that definitely doesn’t look good on the resume. But if nothing is happening behind the scenes to give WSD a disadvantage I would bet the rent on these odds. Dave has back to back “White Trash Picks of the Week” in my Dog Walk Draft Breakdowns. I think he has a competitive fire and a chip on his shoulder. Although he’s in foreign territory I think he will get tremendous support from the homefront. I love Dave in this contest.
My favorite based on odds is White Sox Dave, but I think Donnie is going to win this. I think Donnies pedigree will help him overcome the adversity of the week to be the survivor. My other bet. The winner donates the winnings to the Barstool fund. Barstool people are selfless at heart and I bet at the end of this that 10K goes to the fund and a week of great content is created. Then Dave probably matches the donation and still gives the winner 10K. Viva.
